Gator by Bijou Hunter

Author:Bijou Hunter [Hunter, Bijou]
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Tags: Romance, Contemporary, Literature & Fiction
Amazon: B00IMUT71I
Published: 2014-02-23T18:00:00+00:00

15 Spent Shells

Gator

Mia is happy most of the time. She smiles a lot until dinner. A little girl catches her attention at the restaurant like a ghost of her past stealing away her smiles. I glance at the kid and wonder about having one with Mia. Ours won’t be blond or blue eyed. I imagine my kid looking like me, but hope it has Mia’s soft smile. I miss that smile.

When I place my hand on hers, she finally looks up from her lap.

“I would have been a bad mom, but my baby isn’t better off dead.”

“I know.”

Mia nods then glances once more at the girl. I know even after our meal and the walk back to the hotel that her mind is on the baby she lost. I can’t imagine bringing a child into her hell. Rodent barely kept Mia alive and I suspect the baby wouldn’t have lasted more than a few months.

“I love you,” Mia says as we sit on the balcony.

The words cut into me and I can’t remember ever hearing them before. My mother must have told me at least once that she loved me. I know she did, but I can’t remember it.

Mia’s depressed now because she wants me to say I love her too.

“Words aren’t my strong suit,” I tell her instead.

Mia nods then stands up and walks inside. Figuring she’s angry, I don’t follow. Soon, her absence bothers me and I must chase after her.

Mia sits on the couch with a blanket wrapped around her. Joining her, I can’t say what she wants to hear. I don’t know if what I feel is love. I want Mia to understand me enough to know I can’t pretend.

“I wanted to die when Rodent killed my baby,” she whispers from farther down on the couch. “Tonight, I feel sad.”

“I know.”

“I need to be close, but you push me away,” she says, standing up and moving in front of me. “You think I’m a little girl because I have my doll. The toy was the only thing that was ever mine. I’m not a child and I want you. Don’t push me away anymore, Jake.”

Mia opens the blanket and I see all her flesh before me. My gaze takes in the sight of so much pale skin then my hands reach for her as she straddles me.

“I’m yours,” she whispers and I sense her fear.

“Beautiful Mia.”

When I cup her right tit, her hips buck on my lap then settle back down. She’s focused on my face while I caress her nipple between my thumb and index finger.

No longer are we waiting for that special moment. Hell, I don’t know how to make fucking special. Flowers, candles, shitty music feels wrong. Those are lies because we’re not romantic people. We are the children of evil. I’m a man with blood on my hands while Mia lives with shame in her heart. Broken by life, we can’t lie to each other. This realization is when I understand.

Mia knows me.

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